Posts Tagged ‘ayoba


Google is Raping My Site!

I’m not sure if I can fucking handle this. I like to think of myself as a man of principle, I ‘stand up guy’ as they say and thus, even though I could be making a tidy packet off advertising on this site, I’ve chosen not to go that route because advertising is horse shit and it’s filling our minds with puke.

Me, I got bigger things in my crosshairs than a couple of Gs a month for some bullshit Life Insurance ads on my site.

So anyway, long story short, for some time now I’ve suspected that J-Rab is shit-your-pants crazy because she spotted some random advert on my site a few months back, which I promptly told her is not possible, because, well, I haven’t SOLD any advertising on the site.

Then today I get back from work and she grabs my hand, without saying a word, marches me to her laptop, and shows me the following:



It’s fucking Ayoba time?! It’s FUCKING AYOBA TIME?!?! Christ, what the fuck is going on here? Fuck you MTN and FUCK YOU GOOGLE for raping my site like this without my goddamn permission!

How do I stop this? Somebody help me out here, I mean for fuck’s sake, I HATE MTN and everything they stand for, does no one remember my ‘Death By Ayoba’ post?

God, the irony is killing me!

And even worse than that, they stuck this piece of filth up on my ‘White Nipples’ post. How DARE they defile the sacred White Nipples with this garbage?!

I give up. Seriously. I give the fuck up.

Have a great weekend. Me, I’ll be drinking myself to hell and back, screaming ‘AYOBA’ in the streets until the cops lock me the fuck up and hopefully end my misery.



Site Overhaul 50% complete

Check out the amazingness of this guys – the site overhaul is 50% complete! On the right you’ll see a number of new things have been added, namely a ‘SEARCH’ bar, where you can search Them’s Fightin’ Words for your favourite posts to show to your friends and loved ones (and be the envy of them all).

OR you can just type a random phrase in to read my opinion of that particular topic, like ‘The Cuban Missile Crisis’ for example (um, yeah, don’t type that, it was just an example).



But that’s not all! There’s also now a new section called ‘TOP 10 POSTS’ also on the right where you can check out all the site’s most badass posts according to how many times they’ve been viewed.

You’ll find some classics in there, like the controversial ‘Death By Ayoba’ post and my killer album reviews.

I mean seriously, how fucking rad is that?! This site is MUCH better now!

I wanted to add other stuff too, like a ‘Tweet This’ button after my posts but I couldn’t figure out how to get it working after I downloaded it 😛

I’m no techno-genius. I’m more of a Snake Plissken kinda dude. Ever see that movie Escape From LA? At the end of that, Snake (played by Kurt Russell) detonates this massive electro-magnetic pulse that fries every piece of electrical equipment on the face of earth and basically plunges us all back into the dark ages.



That would be rad. People would run riot in the streets. There’d be no choice but to arm yourself to the teeth, band together with whatever friends and family you could find and fight tooth and nail to survive.

Actually wait, maybe that would be crap…

I wanted to add a whole bunch of other pages to the site too, not just the ‘About’ page, but I need to think carefully about how I want the site navigation to work before I go there and possibly buy and customise my own theme for the site.

Any web developers out there with some spare time on their hands? I’ll take it off your hands for you, no worries, but please note I charge an hourly fee for such services. I’m open to negotiation though 😉

Otherwise we spent most of today making sushi in an effort to not to get too depressed about going back to work tomorrow. I tried my hand at making rainbow rolls and wow! They were TERRIBLE! J-Rab’s were way, way better, partly because she’s more meticulous with her sushi than I am, but also because she actually remembered to roll both the salmon AND the avo on the outside, instead of just the avo.



Duuhhh Slick.

But now the sushi-making is over and the pre-work depression has hit home hard. I love my job and the people I work with, but man-o-man, I don’t wanna go back to work, I just wanna stay here and hang out with you guys.

The whole day’s been grey and rainy and sad songs keep playing on J-Rab’s iPod which isn’t helping.

Tomorrow we join the traffic. Tomorrow our inboxes govern our lives once again. Tomorrow we lift the yoke of modern life again and we beat on, boats against the current…

The good news though is that Random Cat came back to our flat today. Good ol’ Random Cat hasn’t come for a visit for at least a month, but is now comfortably resting on the big couch with that lazy cat look in her eyes that tells me she’s probably going to sleep soon.



If you live a great life, you come back as a domestic cat that gets fed and pampered and has a big garden to explore and play in with your other kitteh-pals.

If you live a shitty life, you come back as a caged tiger and you dream of jungles and hunting all day, but are kept in a tiny enclosure and fed horse meat while kids throw pinecones at you endlessly.

Well, not this tiger. They had no idea what they were dealing with when they built the walls around me and by my guess, they’re more than a couple of feet short.

On three guys.





A Word From The Kind Folks At Nokia

December 2018
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